Almost 3 months

If you ask someone to define success you'll most certainly get your share of different answers. A successful pregnancy_ a successful surgery_ a successful recipe... All require certain things to be deemed successful. I feel like I failed. I feel like I did or didn't do something that I should have and now our children have to beat the odds to have successful futures. And then there's a part of me that knows that that's really not true.. That I didn't do or not do anything to make this happen and I'm mad at myself for crying and feeling how I feel because I feel weak. Enough about me... Lucian had to have laser eye surgery last night due to a condition called ROP which I'm too tired to explain. The eye doctor said he needed enough morphine for a sailor and referred to him as a bronco.. Which could be taken as complimentary that he's such a fighter. At the same time he needed narcane, a drug to reverse the effects of the morphine. He was back on oxygen and not able to eat until this afternoon. The eye doctor will check on him in a week and hopefully we'll have some good news. Emma had some of her immunizations today and is bottle feeding. We had the babies together the night before last, finally! Hopefully they will be home very very soon.